Ooooh, I'm Tellin'!

Howdy! Have you ever felt like you were 'in trouble' with someone?  What does that feel like for you?  What age do you feel like you go to when that feeling is present.  How does your body respond physically?  I get warm and then I get pissed, because I am actually allowing myself to feel small… like a child.  I realize quickly that I am giving my power away and that my feelings are me projecting, being self-centered, and a bit dramatic.  Then I let it go.  Has anyone ever said that to you, that they feel like they are in trouble because you felt annoyance around something they did?  How does that feel for you?

We usually feel like we have done something wrong or are in trouble when we get a reaction from someone who reminds us of a previous, long past reaction.  Maybe our parents would be short with us when they were upset.  Maybe our teachers snapped when we did something wrong in their eyes.  The truth is it was never about you when you were 'in trouble' then and it most certainly isn't at this point in your life when that feeling bubbles up for you.  Taking something personally is actually one of the most self-centered behaviors we can demonstrate.  Taking something personally is making it all about you.  There is always so much more going on with someone who is showing annoyance towards you.  There are years of things that you will probably never know about and needn't concern yourself with that are bringing up annoyance for that person.  When you take offense or take something personally you are giving up your power and becoming someone who is, in many ways, powerless.  Additionally you also create a dramatic event where there may have not been one.

What happens for you when you take something personally?  Are you already feeling bruised in some way?  Are you holding onto something that you cannot communicate without there being an emotional push?  So often people don't know how they feel until it is past the point of coherent communication.  That lack of awareness can cause them to feel walked on because they haven't seen to their needs.  Ownership for where they are, someone who doesn't know how they feel, is the key to peaceful resolution.  The bottom line is no one is responsible for how anyone else feels.  Feelings are personal and are based on what is happening inside of the person having them.  You have an infinite number of ways to take something… personally is just one option.

Next time you feel like someone's 'ish is about you remind yourself that you may be fantastic but you are not the reason for anyone else's situation… and move on.

xo

a